Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Having my cake...Eating it and asking for more

Are there any more good men out there?..... Call me crazy, but it just seems like all the good ones are taken. After visiting countless wedding websites and discovering that I am not the only psycho person out there stuck on these websites, I have come to the conclusion that these stories couldn't be true. If all these men are soo damn great...How come I'm still without my
Harry Winston!"?.....Ok... STOP!...don't answer dat...I am not exactly ready to go down that "path" anyway, but really it would be nice to pick my colors, set my date, and get all the wonderful gifts...Without having to commit of cos. I am all for looking good in the latest gele my friend decides to pick out, I'll show up and say great things about how good a friend she is and how they are made for each other...SHIT!...I'll even help call tables at the wedding, but once my very "Nigerian" mother mentions marriage..I break into cold sweat... and I'm talking the type of sweat that no one sees but you. I can't exactly explain why the whole deal makes me a bit jittery.....but I figured the idea of being stuck with the same person for 50+ years has got to make anyone nervous. I love my independence away from any man and as selfish and utterly feminist as dat might sound..... ITS WAT KEEPS ME TOTALLY SANE!, now don't get me wrong...I do love the idea of having loads of sex under the umbrella of marriage and I guess knowing ur man is gonna be there for life can also be satisfying (so they tell me)..I just can't fathom the thought of not being able to get up and walk when I want to. I have to tell this man where I am, when I'll be back...WHO I'M WITH!!!...GOSH ITS ALL TOO OVERWHELMING...and don't even get me started on "joint accounts"... cos there is NO room for that in my shoe budget.
Ok so maybe I am a bit harsh on the institution of marriage...afterall I do have an amazing man to take that journey with ( as soon as I stop breaking in sweat), BUT....can't I just have him sign a prenup that states that if he upsets me or my "shoes" then I have legal and spiritual grounds to WALK?...I KID! I KID!...mmm ...or do I?

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

The Invasion

Send your kids to bed, close your doors, grab on to your men and wait for the worst......Bee is in town and I am taking all prisoners. OK....So maybe I have a flare for the dramatic, but I did not think I would be caught dead putting my thots online, but then I realized wat damage I could be doing to the world by not doing just dat!. I am well aware of the backlash dat will come with some of my off-the-chart comments...But..Hey...WAT D HELL!!!. I am taking this opportunity to give a SHOUT-OUT (HEYYYYYYYYY!!!) to all my clueless friends who will surely be written about by MOI!!. Being dat I am constantly pushing my own limits with mindless rantings, I will be talking about EVERYTHING!...yes! yes! yes...dat includes SEX (the dreaded three letter word). Welcome to my emotional rollercoster..... It is officially my first entry into "The Diary Of A Confused Woman"